Friday, May 17, 2013

Woman evicted for “too much noise from the bedroom”

 

"kwa nini auntie analia ivyo?" what the neighbour's kid asked his mother

There is a saying that if walls could speak, what they would say would shock us all to the bones. Actually many women suffer behind silent walls and live a very miserable life not knowing what to do.

This was the exact situation Janice found herself in after several years of marriage. A woman is a human being and needs to have sexual fulfillment in a marriage just the way a man does. So what do you do if your husband has got issues of his own that hinder you as a woman from being fulfilled? You may be quick to suggest that you talk to him or seek professional help in the form of counseling. But what if the man gets violent when you make such suggestions?

Janice’s husband Tom did not care about a woman’s feelings, least of all his own wife’s. It is difficult to believe that in this day and age men would exist who are sure that sex is for their own enjoyment and their own enjoyment alone and that their wife should satisfy only their demands as a sense of duty. Janice always suspected that it may have had something to do with the small size of his member which may have dealt a big blow to his esteem and self confidence.

The situation got so bad “being used” by Tom, when he felt like it that she had no alternative but to do the very shameful act of “servicing” herself and masturbating using a pillow. She became so used to it that after a while she stopped crying afterwards.

Probably what keeps many women sane is the fact that they talk a lot to others about their sometimes extremely intimate problems and Janice talked to her close women friends and explained her predicament. Mostly they were shocked to hear the details, but her situation was so complicated that it really had no solution as far as they were concerned. After all divorce was not the kind of thing that was accepted in Africa. In fact divorced women were often looked down on as having something wrong with them, It was assumed that there could never be anything wrong with the man, it was always the woman.

Finally Janice could not bear it any more and walked out of the marriage and started dating other men. Luckily this was a little easy because the marriage had not produced any children and Janice’ friends were not surprised because a man who took less than a minute in the act every time would not have too big a chance of “scoring a goal” surely and causing the birth of any children.

But Tom was really sick in the mind because in a fit of jealousy a few months after Janice had left him, he confronted her and beat her up very badly. It was this beating that caused her to move out of town. Luckily her bosses understood her predicament quickly and posted her to Nairobi from Kisumu. She quickly settled down in the city in the sun and ended up with a man (we shall call him James) who was about 10 years younger than her. One thing led to another and he moved into her house. He was just out of college and jobless.

James was very different from Tom. In fact he was the exact opposite of Tom and knew how to do everything to please and fulfill a woman. Indeed it is this that caused Janice to run into a more embarrassing problem.

It is difficult to tell why exactly she behaved the way she did, but it probably had to something to do with the almost 7 years of being trapped in a very unhappy marriage with Tom.

Janice problem was that she became very “noisy” when having sex with James. So noisy in fact that her neighbors started complaining. For example they would be preparing to go to church with their children on a Sunday morning when suddenly the loud moans culminating into screams would start coming from Door No 4 (which was her door number in the first flats she lived in.)

Naturally the children would get concerned and ask why “aunty” was screaming so early in the morning, and was she being beaten?

In this way she has so far been evicted from at least 3 houses during the time she has been in Nairobi which is barely 3 years. In fact in one estate where she used to live she was some sort of celebrity and that is how we were able to get this story.

The amazing thing is that Janice does not seem embarrassed nor does she seem to care too much about being the kind of “celebrity” she is. Is it because she managed to get out of such a terrible marriage in one piece that causes her to be so carefree and oblivious of disturbing neighbors?

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